my dentist

i have had some dental woes recently and had to get a little surgery last week and my dental surgeon was INSANE. literally.

while he was doing the procedure he was just chattering away. he was talking about his work-out class and how he plays tricks on his wife during class and gets yelled at by the teacher and then he was swearing a little. then he found out i do zumba and then he stood up and starting trying to do some zumba moves right in the middle of everything! zumba is like a latin dance aerobics class in case you dont know...so picture my dentist standing up with his gloves and mask on and like gyrating around the room! then he was making some inappropriate religious jokes and i was like...do i laugh?? do i not?? then he was like IM KIDDING!! IM TRYING TO RELAX YOU! is it working?!?? and i go uhh...no. and he starts laughing and was like uh ohhhhhhhhh she hates me! haha! he said uh oh at one point and was like where was that, oh here it is (like he was confused or something) and i must have looked alarmed so he goes, oh sorry..dont worry ive done this once or twice with like a big laugh. haha! crazy man!

so then i went back today for the post-op and he was like....hey welcome back! (hes all loud and excited...mind you, its 8am) then he goes, youre going to argentina soon, right?? then he proceeds to sing at the top of his lungs....DOOOOOONT CRY FOR ME ARGENTINAAAAAAAAA!!!!! AS he started pulling stitches out and i was like...ow, dont hurt me. and he was like, oh that doesnt hurt..come on, does it? dont be a wuss! and i was like, omg what?! and he goes...thats why dentists get a bad name because ppl expect things to hurt even when they dont and they still make ouch noises. then he turns to his assistant and goes, if she were alive in the dinosaur days, which dinosaur would she be?? (says it fast and chipper like its a quiz) and the assistant says cheerfully (almost in sing-song), a wuss-asaurous! i was like..what?!? then they both cracked up for like five minutes! haha what the heck kind of dentist did i find!?!?

good thing hes good at his job...otherwise we would have had a problem!

**one story i left out from today bc it is semi too gross to tell, but oh well--so he had to remove the stitches from my gums and i was trying to tell him that there was one more in the back. and he goes, where?? and i go..all the way in the back..the big long one!! and he goes, oh here? no no thats not a stitch, its a piece of your gum that came loose and is hanging down. i almost freaked out and go WHAAAT?!?! OMG SICK! and he chuckles and goes, just kidding, its a stitch...and pulls it out. AHHHH WHAT!? HES NUTS!